LINCOLN

DIRECTED BY STEVEN SPIELBERG, this by the "book" (Team of Rivals by Doris Kearns Goodwin) movie is flawless in every way. The historical context is monumental in America's history, the team of seasoned actors are exceptional, the sets and costumes of Washington D.C. in 1865 are beautifully accurate, and the intelligent and emotional dialog is riveting. The month long battle in the House of Representatives to amend the Constitution and abolish slavery, Lincoln's prerequisite to ending the Civil War, is finally won by the Republicans. Euclid's axiom serves as a bridge to racial equality for all men. Griping, moving, a must see.

Les Miserables

What sort of fare is this? Cats meets Chicago? Dreamgirls crossed with West Side Story? Sweeney Todd bred with a War Horse? Romeo and Juliet?

The monumental task of taking this epic musical to the big screen by Tom Hooper must be applauded.

The musical sensation soars on stage and mostly succeeds as a movie. 

This is the story of Jean Valjean, who for decades has been hunted by the ruthless policeman Javert after he breaks parole, who agrees to care for factory worker Fantine's daughter, Cosette. The fateful decision changes their lives forever. Set in early 19th century France, the movie is based on the classic historical novel by Victor Hugo which ranks among one of the greatest novels of all time. Within this dramatic story are themes of crime and punishment, desperation, amorality, oppression, and the possible prison which is the desparate mind. All this and set to the music of Claude-Michel Schonberg makes for an extravagant spectacle that dazzles the senses and touches the heart. 

Hugh Jackman is fantastic and carries the film. Anne Hathaway has neither the voice nor the acting chops to play Fantine. It is during the second half when the ensemble cast takes over that the movie is best. Sasha Baron Cohen and Helena Bonham Carter add sufficient humor to the film. Daniel Huttlestone steals the show during the June uprising of 1832. And I must defend Russell Crowe who can't sing yet can act circles around anyone and is ultimately believable as the relentless Javert. 

I laughed, I cried, I wet my pants (if it was any longer I might have). 

Look Down! Viva La France! Who Am I? Jean Valjean!

"He is asleep. though his mettle was sorely tried. He lived, and when he lost his angel, died. It happened calmly, on its own, the way night comes when day is done." Les Miserables

The Dark Knight Rises

Will the 10am show at The Fenway be safer than the midnight show in Aurora, Colorado? Will The Dark Knight Rises deliver the goods? Yes and no. Each Batman movie seems to be tainted by a tragedy of one sort or another. Loosing the talented Heath Ledger before the opening of The Dark Knight, and now the insane shooting in Colorado. These tragedies highlight the fact that as bad as it is, and it's bad, this is still only a movie.

Beyond the creative opening scene, reminiscent of a James Bond opening, The Dark Knight Rises is a long, dark slog through Gotham (aka Manhattan). With a cast including big name Hollywood talents like Christian Bale, Morgan Freeman, Michael Caine, Marion Cotillard, Gary Oldham, Tom Hardy, Anne Hathaway and The Batman, how could Christopher Nolan have gone so wrong?

The movie's back and forth between subplots and scenes can make one batty. Is it day or night? What season is it? Are we in the city or a hole in the desert? How long do we have until that nuclear bomb goes off? The use of space & time is erratic. The action is diminished by the constant scene changes.

The shots of lower Manhattan with it's bridges blowing up and New York's finest trapped underground in the subway are reminiscent of 9/11. Yet any connection is lost in the confusion of this big, brash movie. The nuclear ending is contrived and serves only to set up the Batman and "Robin" sequel.

The Dark Knight rises is an action film of epic yet empty proportions.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show

Movies of a certain age in Harvard Square. Who knew this was in our backyard for 28 years? Drunken, scantily clad crowd makes up for Security lines. Show sufficiently sexual. Muppets meet porn meets Fuck Your Mother. The Time Warp is the Hokey Pokey with grinding. Miss Saradon (slut), "I loved you in The Rocky Horror Picture Show". There are no phones in castles, only tranies. You'd know the script too if you attended 250+ times. I am no longer a virgin. For the rest of you who have not popped the cherry, the show re-opens in Boston on 8/4/12. Gary will in Spanx, I'll be in Hanky Panky. RHPS lives, if you can stay awake.

SAVAGES

Savages, the sex and drugs hyped thriller from three-time Oscar winning director Oliver Stone, can not sustain the high. Who took the meeting when it was decided to put an all star cast, including John Travolta, Salma Hayek, and Benicio Del Toro, around Gossip Girl airhead Blake Lively? The girl can't act, how can she be expected to generate any sort of empathy when captured by the Mexican drug cartel! Ben & Chon, her boutique boyfriends from Laguna Beach, grow designer grass and are shocked when the big guys want a split. The cross and double cross as they jockey to free lovely Ophelia falls flat. No buzz here. Any homage to Quentin Tarantino's Pulp Fiction goes puff. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly-esque shoot out ending is a drag. Stone's double ending bone bombs. Savages blows a lot of smoke and never hits pay dirt. A weed kill if I ever saw one. Inhale at your own risk.

TED

Ted is the perfect mix of childhood fantasy, bad taste, and Boston! When I heard myself guffawing at fart jokes, pot jokes, and pussy jokes, I realized I was channeling my inner 13 year old boy. I was thoroughly enjoying Mark Walhberg (still hot), a teddy bear (Ted), and shots of my hometown (South End, Hatch Shell, Cambridge).


The movie premise being that as the result of a childhood wish, John Bennett's teddy bear, Ted, comes to life and has been by John's side ever since - a friendship that's tested when Lori (Mila Kunis), John's girlfriend of four years, wants more from their relationship. This comedy by "Family Guy" creator Seth MacFarlane keeps the bad jokes coming while taking you on a visual tour of Boston not seen since The Town. (Ted also utilizes fabulous Fenway for it's tragi-comi ending.) Somehow there is a sweet love story thrown in the mix. 

Ted, unlike Trix, is not for kids but rather adults who still have some juvenile at haaart (sp).

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

Abraham Lincoln, the 16th President of the United States, discovers vampires are planning to take over the United States. He makes it his mission to eliminate them. The premise may have worked in print as written by Seth Grahame-Smith but it fails miserably on the big screen. Filmmakers Tim Burton and Timur Bekmambetov take themselves far too seriously while the cast is wooden and bland. The terrifying creatures of the night are visceral and bloodthristy but not really all that scary. Apparently the undead made up the entire southern army. The special effects are decent and reminiscent of Burton's Dark Shadows, which at least had Johnny Depp and a few good jokes. Vampire Hunter should have a stake through it!


Personal Note: I did see this weak and laughable movie. I went as an homage to the Harvard Square Cinema, an institution for 28 years in Cambridge, which closes 7/8/12. Why? So Apple or another large chain can open? The Square has lost it's eclectic flavor and mirrors every vanilla mall across America. Freddie Taylor I salute your vision. I will miss the broken seats and lack of a first floor bathroom. See you on the 7th for the last Rocky Horror Picture show.